Tic Tac Toe, like long division and using your turn signal, is a dying in art in this great nation. Now we have Fortnite and Candy Crush, third-string Chiefs running backs to grab on the waiver wire and pizza orders to scream at Alexa. There's no time in this hectic modern life for Xs and Os, a fact made painfully clear at halftime of Wednesday night's Pacers game, when two humble rocket scientists played perhaps the single most inept game in Tic Tac Toe human history. SURGEON GENERAL'S WARNING: You IQ will drop 50 points just watching this.
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Truly, utterly miraculous. Each player snatches defeat from the jaws of victory at least twice over the course this minute-long plunge to the depths of human intellect, demonstrating zero understanding of the game Tic Tac Toe and, for that matter, basic arithmetic. You know that “hold my beer” meme? Yeah, this is that made sentient:
FacebookPinterestAdding to the mind-numbing absurdity of this whole thing, is..
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Researchers with nothing better to do determine James Bond is a raging alcoholic
Cancer, famine, global warming, income disparity, how far the average golfer drives it, equality in all shapes, sizes, and colors. There are plenty of important issues facing the world today that are in dire need of critical thinkers and dedicated research, but one team of galaxy brains from New Zealand’s University of Otago have dedicated their scientific livelihoods to an altogether different pursuit: Determining whether or not James Bond—a fictional character who is always drinking—has a fictional drinking problem.
Spoiler Alert: Yep.
FacebookPinterestPart of recent study titled License to Swill: James Bond’s drinking over six decades* (we aren't making this up), four actual human beings have concluded that Mr. Bond, over the course of 60 years of non-stop martini-swilling, Aston Martin-wrecking debauchery, has engaged in 109 drinking events (an average of 4.5 per film) while satisfying six of 11 DSM-5 criteria for “sever alcohol use disorder.” At his most intoxicated—after dow..
NASA invites moon-landing truther Steph Curry to tour their Lunar Labs
Roberto Machado NoaWe wanted to ignore this. Really, we did. We didn't want to give lip service to another NBA star spouting questionable scientific theories. We already get enough of that from the President. But it's 2018 and here we are. On Monday, Steph Curry posed a simple question to fellow ballers Vince Carter, Kent Bazemore, and Andre Igoudala on The Ringer's Winging It podcast. “We ever been to the moon?” he asked. Literally no one in the room (including Mr. Infiniti Spokesperson himself) believed that we had.
That probably should have been the end of that. Honestly, we shouldn't really care whether or not we went to the moon—a barren rock in the sky with absolutely no use to mankind other than to make the oceans come in and go out—but we do, and by Tuesday afternoon the story was everywhere. STEPH CURRY DOESN'T BELIEVE WE WENT TO MOON the internet howled so loud that even NASA, who should probably be focused on, oh I don't know, the $2.5 billion l..
Golf club thief dubbed the “Doof of Hazzard” caught thanks to funny video posted by police
A golf club thief in Arizona who wasn't caught helped produce one of the best stories in golf over the weekend when Cody Blick responded by firing a 63 with a substitute set of sticks to earn coveted status on the Web.com Tour for next season. A golf thief in Texas wasn't quite as lucky with how things turned out.
RELATED: Watch a golf club thief fall on his face trying to make a getaway
Blick took to Instagram to offer a $5,000 reward, no questions asked, for his clubs, but never got any leads. The Fort Worth culprit was a lot easier to track down on social media, though, thanks to surveillance footage — and a creative twist. Check out the funny video put together by the Fort Worth Police Department (via the Star-Telegram) in which they dub this bozo the “Doof of Hazzard” because of his odd choice to put the taken clubs and himself through the driver-side window instead of opening the car door:
Well played, guys. And here's a look at the “real” Dukes of Hazzard making a..
Blues defenseman scores goal off ref’s groin, but it gets disallowed because the Blues can’t catch a break
Coming off a rough 48-hour stretch that included an embarrassing 6-1 loss on home ice and a teammate-on-teammate fight in the very next practice, the St. Louis Blues were in desperate need of something to go their way on Tuesday against the Florida Panthers. A good bounce of the puck, an early power play, or anything that resembled positive momentum to get the crowd into it would have been a welcome sight.
Less than six minutes into the game, St. Louis got exactly that when defenseman Robert Bortuzzo (who was involved in the donnybrook on Monday) routinely dumped the puck in to the right corner of Florida's defensive zone. As it sailed toward referee Tim Peel, he was unable to get out of the way in time, and the puck caromed right off his groin, miraculously finding the back of the net as Panthers goalie Robert Luongo failed to corral it:
https://twitter.com/darrenrovell/status/1072707430843383809
However, as Blues play-by-play man John Kelly was quick to point out, a goal does no..
Cody Blick tells his crazy Q School stolen clubs story, and our Christmas golf wish lists
Cody Blick tells his crazy Q School stolen clubs story, and our Christmas golf wish lists