We know, we know, another “The Last Dance,” Michael Jordan-related post. What do you want from us? There's simply nothing else right now.
At least this time, we're taking a different approach. Rather than rehashing something that occurred during episodes three and four Sunday night (as fun as it is), we came up with our own spin on the “Jordan Rules,” golf style. What are the “Jordan Rules,” you ask? Ok, we'll rehash that:
https://twitter.com/TaylorRooks/status/1254584450001797120
One key one left out here was that if Jordan looks to get airborne, don't let him. Basically, put him on the ground. The rules were so effective that the Detroit Pistons were able to beat the Chicago Bulls in a playoff series three straight times, forcing Jordan to completely change his offseason routine and bulk up to deliver the punishment rather than take it.
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MIKE NELSONThe world needs another story about the Jordan-era Chicago Bulls about as much as it needs to the leader of the free world to keep telling his desperate, uninformed constituency that drinking Clorox will kill the coronavirus. It's Monday afternoon, less than 24 hours after the premiere of episodes three and four of 'The Last Dance,' and The Loop alone is already up to three Bulls-centric posts and counting. We say counting, because when Bill Simmons fired up the Twitter oven on Monday afternoon and the warm, comforting smell of terrible take cake began wafting through the house, we had no choice but to go ahead and finish off the quartet with a doozy. Go ahead, Bill. Do us the honors.
https://twitter.com/BillSimmons/status/1254794879961403393
We didn't want to do this. Really, we didn't. We were this close to holding off too, but then ol' Bill circled back for more punishment, clarifying it was everyone else's fault that he's an idiot…

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Kevin MazurAlright, we're going to level with you: Every Monday for the next month, you're going to get absolutely flattened by Michael Jordan stories. We're talking straight-up steamrolled. You can blame ThE dAMn mEdIA or you can blame ESPN's 10-part documentary 'The Last Dance,' which airs every Sunday night with a new clip of Michael-Jordan-was-the-most-competitive-SOB-to-ever-walk-this-earth stories locked and loaded. This week, those tall tales centered around the Bulls' battles with (and eventual vanquishing of) the Bad Boy Pistons and, of course, Carmen Electra, but the most telling story of the week wasn't part of 'The Last Dance' at all. Instead it came by way of one Eminem, who recently appeared on Sway in the Morning with this gem about the time he once joked about dunking on Michael Jordan to Michael Jordan's face. First mistake, last mistake, as they say.
I don’t know Paul [Eminem's manager Paul Rosenberg], if you..